Nov 27, 2008

Devastation in Mumbai

The latest news of terrorism out of Mumbai is shaking the world, especially the surrocagy India world which I am entrenched in. Have heard from Doctor Sudhir this morning and he has assured me that he and all the SI people are fine, as well all the beautiful surrogates. Thanks goodness. This news became very personal to Mark and I as we sit glued to the TV in utter shock of the circumstance. Our friends who travel soon, Amani and Rick, jaxusa,chicagorealtor, Joy and anyone else I may have missed...take good care! I am sure now security will be at its highest.

Nov 21, 2008

Road Block!

It is so frustrating that someone who can help you decides not too. Today I question everything and wonder why things have to be such a struggle.

Nov 18, 2008

Saw the Doctor!

Finally the long awaited appointment came. Dr L, to my surprise was not shocked by my request for support to do surrogacy. My biggest fear was that he would say "Surrogacy?? Get the hell outta here". So, happily this did not happen. He feels that this is a great option for us and we should have good success based on my medical situation and the pros and cons of low papp-a etc. So this is great, BUT he is not comfortable with satellite monitoring for many reasons and I can appreciate this. We talked about options and he said if I was his wife he would want me to do all the cycling in India. This is a dilemma...3-4 weeks off of work and in India..hmm...is this do-able? I don't know. He speaks from his own experience and is a very knowlegable IVF doc. He also wants to speak with his business partner about their comfor levels etc... and possibly come up with a plan B for us - with the sole concern of cycling and getting to India. He needs to talk and think about it and promised to get back to me in the next few days. I respect him and everything he told me. He did make good sense just was a bit off the path I had hoped for. So, I will wait and see what he comes up with. He is happy to support us with getting into the SI program and will write the necessary letter to Dr S and Dr Yash to get us enrolled. This is great and I am very appreciative of it. So here I sit with more mixed thoughts and wondering what the next steps will be. We are that much closer...just a few more big steps to India!

Nov 15, 2008

So many emotions and thoughts.

Being part of the surrogacy support group is so great. Sometimes its hard tho'. We all want the same thing and the ups and downs, good news bad news is a daily struggle for everyone. I think that we can take strength from our positive friends and help our friends in need. The experience alone of going to Mumbai is life changing and momentous. The tales from these trips are of courage and heartache. I guess I am rambling, just feeling vulnerable today and know that someone out there is feeling exactly the same as me. I think reading a friends blog today has made me feel so sympathetic for her and her struggles and it reminds me to take off my rose coloured glasses once and a while. Maybe I am just anxious about seeing the doctor on Monday - hoping he gets it and supports us. We are in a different predicament then others we have connected with yet its all the same when its said and done. We just want a family Ok, my dear friend R from Canada/USA take good care of yourself. I am feeling for you and want only the best for you and hubby.

Nov 11, 2008

Countdown....... 7,6,5,4,3....

So FINALLY I will see my doctor here. My appointment is on Monday the 17th! Woo hoo!@!!! Been a very long wait to see him. We are just praying that he will support us in our path to India. If he isn't feeling it we will move on to another doc and another til we get support. I hate the thought of trying to find docs and all that but we are not giving up on this last hope!

Nov 6, 2008

Sad news..

So I am feeling sad today. The wonderful Dr in India has lost his own child today. I am not sure what happened, but I am very sad for his loss. The baby was 10 months old and it just breaks my heart. The fact that this man dedicates his life to helping others have children and now suffers such a tremendous loss himself - its a tragedy. Puts me back into perspective tho'. Over the last few days I have been feeling anxious about our journey...so many what ifs that my mind is boggled. And now, right now, I feel that I am fortunate to even have this opportunity and if it takes six more months to get rolling than so be it. My thoughts are with you Dr. S